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If I could sit still

There is a guild of master seraphim, gods of sacrifice more so than mercy,

For they have been chosen by YHWH to study the visible world, a task which most angels forsake for the joy of celebration.

And these masters toil in relative obscurity to everyone but Jehovah,

Yes, the one of many faces is one of few who cherish their focus,

For these, the stewards of visible understanding, though often judged as useless, create the gravity of exploration, curiosity, consistency, analysis, synthesis, noble discovery, objective honesty, and invention that steers the consciousness of man toward advancement.

But often through the pain of suffering, they toil in stressful scripts of legalism, to write and read and create, just to stay safe, in a world that doubts their courage,

But Jehovah rejoices in their bravery,

For only the courageous can search for a thing, study a thing, document a thing, fall in love with a thing, and let go of a thing, because they realize that it was an illusion of human error.

Yes, blending imagination with responsibility and logic with reflection, these Mentats of a world that is losing its reason, forsaking one of the greatest of God's gifts, for the inspiration and yet potential manipulation of narrative.

These, the Mentats of a consciousness, seem to war in vain in a world that is betraying the structure and order of inquiry to the wicked chaos of presumption.

And so these Seraphim, these warriors of intellect, have become sorrowful unto a cynicism that destroys there beauty,

For even they have begun to doubt the veracity of their contribution.

A time ago, Elohim chose me, a young angel of the logos, living communication, to go and learn from them,

And I resisted, for I like many others, wove tails of beauty and power which enlivened all who came in my path,

But my stories lacked the discipline of these noble ones, and so Elohim sent me to study among them.

And at first, I hated their precision and specificity, for it made me feel as one who was lost,

Much the way that some of them have felt always.

And I cried out to Jehovah, "let this cup pass from me!"  and Jehovah responded, "you are deluded my son.  For where I have sent you is not hell but rather a heaven that you run in your refusal to sit still and discover the secrets of your kind."

And I responded with anger, "Yes my Lord.  But this discipline is beyond me. Have I not already proven my obedience."

And Elohim, many as one, distinct yet the same, said, "Brother!  We will always love you as one of us the brilliant stars of human beauty.   But you have forgotten that you are no greater than the smallest flower, though perhaps worth more.  What have you done, without our help?  And what can you earn, besides our love?  In the end there is only love and the works that it calls us to walk in."

And so I surrendered my soul, and my eyes were opened.

And I saw the Mentats, not as cowards, but of warriors of logic and protectors of honesty, as the stewards of an objectivity that we are slowly losing.

And I cried out to Elohim the invisible and visible, the hive of oneness, defined by unique unity, "Thank you for opening my eyes for my heart is free, but my mind is still swimming in the amorphous power of narrative and I cannot sit still!  So I will soften the hearts of these mentats with my admiration and unquenchable joy, and then I shall leave having learned of this Guild's beauty, the Guild of Knowledge that anchors our collective intellect."

And Shakina, the Queen of all things said, "No my son.  For it is not for you to soften them.  Are they already not serving my purpose?  Am I not living intellect, personified observation, holding the Universe together with the organic law of my wisdom?"

And so I cried to Shakina out of anger, "And so what am I to do my Queen?"  And she said, "you must walk in the darkness of your own chaos, step by step, the best that you can, and trust me for the rest.  For there will come a time, when you too bring the light of my mind, my perfect mind of order to the world!"

And so, my brothers and sisters, I sometimes sit. I sometimes run in profligate and irresponsible nakedness as David before me.  I sometimes lock into the motion of diligence.  But in this space, I am often tormented by the volatility of my excellence, constantly searching for ways to unlock a more consistent character, who honorably practices the motion of noble discovery.

But I tell you this, Elohim, I have hope in us.  I have hope that together we shall encounter the body electric that illuminates curiosity.

And when we do, the Earth shall quake!

Woodrow Lucas

PHD Student - Vanderbilt University

4000 Anderson Rd. unit 79A

Nashville, TN 37217

(615) 322-8655